About Me

Name: Liz

Location: New York

I'm 37 and have been happily married since Sept. 2002. Ivan is truly my companion in life. Our TTC journey has felt like a never ending roller coaster ride. We had an ectopic PG in Dec. 04 and in April 05 found out my IF is due to tubal abnormality. We were told IVF was our only hope. July 05 we did IVF # 1 and it was a chemical PG. We did IVF # 2 in Oct. 05 and it was a BFN. In Jan. 06 we did a combined fresh and frozen embryo transfer and it was a BFN. We were determined not to give up our dream of having a baby. IVF # 4 was in April 06. The cycle worked like a charm and on December 20, 2006 we were blessed with Hannah and Matthew.

Some days are better than others. Sometimes it's easy to pretend. I'm feeling a little better ...maybe there is hope for me...LOL. Heather's news was comforting. I am VERY happy for her and it gives me hope that I might be able to get my miracle.

I'm trying to "pick myself up". I know I can do it and I am determined to be hopeful and have a positive attitude for when I start IVF. I am accepting that right now this is depressing me and I have to do something about it. I can't let it continue to take my happiness from me. I can't believe how much power I've given infertility.

I feel bad for Ivan. He has to see and live with how I'm feeling and there is nothing he can do about it. He can't fix this, he can't make it right, he can't take my pain away, he can't fix my tubes, he can't look at me without feeling sad, he can't guarantee that I will have a baby ...what a relief to let it out. Although I focus on what I don't have, I know that I'm lucky and blessed to have him.

For the next few days I am determined to let it all out. No more hiding, no more what ifs...it's about accepting what reality is and moving forward.

When Nature Is Not Enough
IVF will hopefully bring us the miracle we are waiting for.
About Me Name: Liz Location: New York I'm 37 and have been happily married since Sept. 2002. Ivan is truly my companion in life. Our TTC journey has felt like a never ending roller coaster ride. We had an ectopic PG in Dec. 04 and in April 05 found out my IF is due to tubal abnormality. We were told IVF was our only hope. July 05 we did IVF # 1 and it was a chemical PG. We did IVF # 2 in Oct. 05 and it was a BFN. In Jan. 06 we did a combined fresh and frozen embryo transfer and it was a BFN. We were determined not to give up our dream of having a baby. IVF # 4 was in April 06. The cycle worked like a charm and on December 20, 2006 we were blessed with Hannah and Matthew. View my complete profile	Friday, May 27, 2005 Trying to go on Some days are better than others. Sometimes it's easy to pretend. I'm feeling a little better ...maybe there is hope for me...LOL. Heather's news was comforting. I am VERY happy for her and it gives me hope that I might be able to get my miracle. I'm trying to "pick myself up". I know I can do it and I am determined to be hopeful and have a positive attitude for when I start IVF. I am accepting that right now this is depressing me and I have to do something about it. I can't let it continue to take my happiness from me. I can't believe how much power I've given infertility. I feel bad for Ivan. He has to see and live with how I'm feeling and there is nothing he can do about it. He can't fix this, he can't make it right, he can't take my pain away, he can't fix my tubes, he can't look at me without feeling sad, he can't guarantee that I will have a baby ...what a relief to let it out. Although I focus on what I don't have, I know that I'm lucky and blessed to have him. For the next few days I am determined to let it all out. No more hiding, no more what ifs...it's about accepting what reality is and moving forward. \| posted by Liz at 4:05 PM \| 3 Comments: Jenn commented at 8:03 PM~ I hope you are doing ok. TTC is so hard...especially when you feel like you are going to a place you never wanted to go. My 3rd IUI cycle and I am about ready to give up...but hang in there...I know it will happen for you. Anonymous commented at 9:55 AM~ I'm sorry things are so hard and emotional. I'm glad you are trying to process what you are feeling. I hope you will start feeling better soon. Thinking of you. Heather P. commented at 8:12 PM~ Liz, I am so glad I finally found your blog. I was linked to another one with the same title about!! Just enought that I couldn't find it!! I found it right thru Lesley's blog!! LOL Hope is why we live. Hope is why we get up each morning. Hope is everywhere we just have to figure out how we can hope that the next step or choice will be the right one. I am going to pray that you find some hope. I know you have it. I know it is hard to give up on the idea of getting pregnant the old fashioned way but take it from one who has been there. We have hope that we can have a child of our own thru IVF. It wouldn't happen for me otherwise. I am going to pray for you Heather Want to Post a Comment? back to main page
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