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IVF will hopefully bring us the miracle we are waiting for. |
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About Me
I'm 37 and have been happily married since Sept. 2002. Ivan is truly my companion in life. Our TTC journey has felt like a never ending roller coaster ride. We had an ectopic PG in Dec. 04 and in April 05 found out my IF is due to tubal abnormality. We were told IVF was our only hope. July 05 we did IVF # 1 and it was a chemical PG. We did IVF # 2 in Oct. 05 and it was a BFN. In Jan. 06 we did a combined fresh and frozen embryo transfer and it was a BFN. We were determined not to give up our dream of having a baby. IVF # 4 was in April 06. The cycle worked like a charm and on December 20, 2006 we were blessed with Hannah and Matthew. |
Tuesday, August 16, 2005 Big Fat Miracle....YES
I am still in shock.... I can't believe it. I had already written a post about the negative. Well for those that don't know I took a HPT on Sat. and it was negative. I had been expecting the negative because I had been spotting and was having AF like cramps. I just assumed it hadn't worked. I waited to test on a day that Ivan was working so I could process the disappointment.
The hardest part for me was telling Ivan that I wasn't pregnant. The look on his face just made me cry. Despite the negative he insisted that we not lose hope. He said he would not accept it until we got the results from the beta. So we were both sad and angry this weekend. I was trying to figure out what I had done wrong...gotta blame something so why not blame myself. We discussed our options and were ready to do another cycle. I went for my beta yesterday morning and was dreading the call from the nurse because that would make it real. Here's how the conversation went: Me: Hello Nurse: Liz, how are you? Me: I'm alright. Nurse: You're better then alright you're pregnant. Me: WHAT?!!! Nurse: It was positive. Me: WHAT but I took a test this weekend and it was negative. Nurse: You took a bloodtest? Me: No, a HPT. Nurse: You're not suppose to do that of course it's going to be a negative. Me: So I'm pregnant?!. Nurse: Yes, you are. ME: Oh my God...I can't believe this... OMG...I'm in shock...I'm going to cry. Then we talked about my PIO shots. After I hung up I just started to cry. I couldn't believe it worked...I still can't. I was going to burst so I called Catherine and Jenna who I had spoken to this weekend about the negative. I then called Ally to tell her to disregard her negative. Those darn HPTs cause such stress but I must admit if it hadn't been for that negative I really would not have known how much Ivan was committed to this. I lied to Ivan and told him the results were not in and they would call me today. There was no way I was going to tell him over the phone. I left work early and purchased a few gifts for the father to be. When he got home he found his gifts. The first was a bib that said "I Love Daddy". The second gift was 3 classical music CDs for the baby (Ivan is a classical guitarist and he's always saying how when we have a baby he will play classical music for it). Then there was a card. He was in shock and as he opened the card his hands trembled. The card said "A miracle from Heaven to fill our hearts and lives with love, Congratutions DAD". I wrote a few things and ended with WE DID IT and that's when it registered. The look on his face when he came to the room was priceless. We hugged and he held me in his arms for so long. I am still in shock. We discussed the beta being 53 and we're very hopeful that it will continue to double. I go back on Thursday for my second beta. Thank you all so much for all of your support and sharing my journey with me. 10 Comments:
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